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or why can’t I sleep when the kids are not home?

Sleep

Some sort of parental Murphy’s Law must exist whereas on any weekday, if given the chance, we would all sleep late, like say 8:30 (ha!) and yet when Saturday rolls around the shorties wake up at the crack of dawn.  Simply not fair. Perhaps their little internal clocks automatically switch to fun just as twice a year we change the time arbitrarily for daylight savings even though our bodies do not like that much either.  An extra hour of sleep?  I still do not buy that one.  Monday morning rolls around, and again like clockwork, my girls cannot seem to wake up unless I were to whisper something like “donuts”.  But that would just be plain wrong.

How often as a parent do we dream of a time when we can sleep late, guilt free, as if we were still kid-less, like teenagers till noon type of deep coma sleep?  Thinking back to the days when they were tiny babies, when I truly believed  I would never sleep for more than a full hour at a time, that sort of sleep would have been like heaven.  Again, If given the chance my body simply would not have allowed such a thing.  As a Mother, we always have one eye and ear open, ever ready to jump up and do something… well motherly.  Falling asleep and staying asleep is very difficult when you know you will be woken up at any time.

Now my children are a bit older, and though it’s no secret that the little one still hops into bed to snuggle with me, they of course, do not wake up ten times a night anymore. Usually.  I do so miss nap time though. A curious phenomenon has been occurring over the last several months.  The girlies go to Dad’s house for their requisite visits every other weekend.  Over the last few years I have slowly but surely gotten used to their absences though of course I miss them dearly.  I don’t like to share my toys.  And the first year or so I didn’t know quite what to do with myself as there is only so much laundry folding one can do…  I got over that one.

One would think that after putting in the full-time parental duties 90% of the time I would be ready to drop by the time that weekend away rolls around…  Here I have a guilt free weekend, more or less, to actually sleep late if I so choose.  And here is where the curious part is….  I absolutely cannot get any decent rest at all without my girlies home.  I tossed and turned last night, until finally succumbing to sleep around 4:00 in the morning and awoke at 7:30, only to find I was out of coffee.  Insult meet injury. Needless to say I was fairly unproductive for at least half the day, possibly more.

My eldest daughter called earlier this evening to tell me about her day as she always does.  And though it sounded like she had a great day, she sounded, well, sleepy.  When I asked her, she turned the question to me as I fumbled through an answer. She said “Mommy I just don’t sleep well when I am somewhere you are not I think we are just wired together or something.”  How can I argue with such wisdom?

Amazing the clarity and wisdom that children possess.  So as I later reflect on this statement, when I go to sleep tonight I will think about how the three of us are wired together whether we are physically present or not.  They are forever with me as I am with them, hardwired together in our hearts.  Goodnight my sweet peas.  Mommy loves you more than all the stars in the sky…

-Charmed I Am Sure

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